Re: from Houston

If I knew this Houstonian volunteer, I might try to get in touch with him - - -
I just witnessed selfish, arrogant, unappreciative behavior by the very people who need help the most. - - - because he has just behaved in the same way, for far less reason than those who angered him so and he doesn't know he's responding to his own grief.

He thought he wanted to be a Good Samaritan but he didn't know who the Good Samaritan was. Samaritans were considered to be inferior, at best. Jews did not associate with Samaritans. It was because of the enmity between these peoples that Jesus' parable of the Good Samaritan had impact.

I think we imagine an appreciative response to the Good Samaritan's act of kindness and assume we can expect gratitude when we perform in the same manner. There was no mention of gratitude in the parable. The parables were about behavior, not about the reward. A faithful Jew knew his reward would come from God.

Standing in the sandals of those who heard His voice, we would hear a story about a man who had been beaten and robbed and left by the road. It was, apparently, a busy road. People passed by, observed the victim and continued on their journeys.

Already, we knew this was wrong and we listened more carefully. When the Samaritan man came along, he bent to help. We were startled. We could have believed that a Samaritan might have been involved in the attack. Samaritans are different; they are inferior. We do not associate with Samaritans. We do not trust Samaritans. We are more than surprised to hear of a Samaritan with such compassion yet here he is binding wounds of his enemy, giving up his own transportation to the wounded man, leading the victim-laden donkey to a local inn and devoting himself to the care of the beaten man. In the end -- and it was the end -- the Samaritan paid the innkeeper to care for the man and promised to return and cover any further expenses.

We don't know how the innkeeper felt. Did he want that man in his inn? Did he want this responsibility? Did he believe the Samaritan would return?

We don't know how the victim responded. We don't know if he was grateful for the Samaritan's help. We don't know if he was even at the inn when the Samaritan returned. We do believe the Samaritan returned. The Master would not have told this story if this Samaritan had not been a man of integrity.

This story is not about reciprocation. The Master's parables are His teachings, His exposition, of God's expectations of His chosen people. This story is meant to teach attitudes and behaviors to us, the Chosen. It's all about us and never about others. God has expectations of us. And, it ends there. He has not given us permission to expect from others appreciation or payment. We are, in fact, to turn the other cheek, to forgive endlessly. And, Jesus, the Master showed us just how much we may be expected to forgive. He was spat upon, He was beaten, He was crucified and, from the cross, He asked God to forgive all.

The volunteer who wrote this piece was not responding to God's direction. His was a social gesture. Society does not command that he love his brother, his neighbor and his enemy unconditionally. It is our social custom to expect reciprocity. He expected a return.
I went to volunteer on Saturday at the George R. Brown convention for two reasons.
A: I wanted to help people to get a warm fuzzy.
B: Curiosity.

Do you think he did not expect to leave with his own warm fuzzy feeling? He admitted as much when he said, I felt that warm fuzzy while helping unload these vehicles of these wonderful human beings. His second reason, curiosity, was a sure indication that he intended to share this experience with others. He could have, as they say, “eaten out on this for months.”

I wish this man had worked with us in Southern Illinois during the flood of ’93. That would have eliminated his references to skin color. As to the rest, I would not say.

Because he expected social reciprocity and had no training to prepare him for the task, he did not know what to expect or how to interpret what he encountered. In crisis, all people revert to childhood and this volunteer, whatever his level of maturity, reverted to the mind of a child and screamed at us, “It’s not fair!” He didn’t understand that only a mother accepts dandelions graciously when she would have preferred violets. He didn’t remember those days when he was offered comfort food so he resented those who wanted familiar food. He considered the deli sandwiches a tempting spread and was irritated and insulted when some disagreed.

He didn’t know that people are as passive-aggressive as children when they have no power. He’d called these people the weakest of society. These people were, at that moment, powerless and their anger would, naturally, be directed at those who seemed powerful and safe. The young men who stood against the wall and refused, with verbal vehemence, to help carry mattresses? They were using the only power they had. They could say “No!” – as any beyond the “terrible twos” is able to do. It’s an expression of personal power.

The volunteer had curiosity, not compassion.
Compassion (noun): the humane quality of understanding the suffering of others and wanting to do something about it; a deep awareness of and sympathy for another's suffering.

He lacked compassion for these people who’d been torn from their roots and left drifting. They had not only lost homes, they’d lost everything familiar. The first “shelter” had been a sham. Now, they’d been “rescued” from that situation and taken further from their roots. Their entire beings were occupied with the losses they’d suffered and with the uncertain future. What was the volunteer’s occupation? He handed out cold water as the evacuees left the bus and this is what concerned him: Many would take them and only 20% or less said thank you. Lots of them would shake their heads and ask for sodas! So this went on for about 20-30 minutes until I was sick of being an unappreciated servant.

Faced with gulf between the dissociative behavior of these people and his expectations, he was angry. Had he had any knowledge or training, he might have understood that very little that happened “to him” had anything to do with him and much to do with predictable display of disassociation, the common response to trauma. A good volunteer, a proper volunteer, does not expect thanks. He knows his duty and he does it. If he is very fortunate, he may learn later that he has been appreciated by those he tended or served. God returns rewards in odd ways. He does not speak of reciprocity. Two years after my work in the flood, I received a call from a stranger who told me his sister-in-law had asked him to call. Her husband, his brother, had died and she wanted me to know. For some time thereafter, I was involved in grief counseling for the brother. I understood this new task was really a personal thank you from a woman I’d met during the flood. She’d remembered and trusted me.

This man was not a proper volunteer. He spent the day searching for a comfort zone. They would eat their food and leave their mess on the table some would pick up their stuff many would leave it for the volunteers to pick up. I left that real quick to go down and help set up some more beds. I saw many young ladies carrying mattresses and I helped for a while. He helped, that is, until he saw the young men and boys along the wall. Then, he was angry again and demanding again and very definitely unappreciated again. In all his attention to himself and his own feelings, he had no chance to realize that the women were carrying mattresses because they had a mission. They were not helping the volunteers. They were doing what they had done since early childhood. They were tending the nest. They had, for the moment, found an occupation familiar and comforting. And, in doing this, they had found some of their personal power.

This Houstonian volunteer understood that conditions were improving for the flood victims and he could only demand that they see and appreciate the improvements. The volunteer looked at the facility and the accommodations and pronounced them BUM HEAVEN for the poor evacuees. He was impressed by utility [hospital, kitchen, showers, toilets] and the comfort [shelter, mattresses] provided by volunteers. He was impressed with the mounds of items brought by the carload -- And lots of it was NEW, he told us.

Those things brought by families and family cars were from volunteers. All else was brought by organizations – professionals, who know what a city of displaced people need. The donations brought by individuals were charity. The hospitals and kitchens and sanitary facilities were not charity. They were a part of the life-saving plan of a private, but professional, Quartermaster Corps called to any devastated community. None of this was done because the victims were deserving of it. It was done because we honor human life and this is how we respond in times of catastrophic need.

In the end, it became clear that our Houstonian volunteer was angry enough to express his real feelings. Even the little kids were demanding. I saw only ONE white family and only TWO Hispanic families. The rest where blacks. sorry 20% to 30% decent blacks and 70% LOSERS!!!!! Though he disclaimed blaming any ethnic group for his frustration, he made it plain (in vile terms) that he did blame certain people and asserted that he could predict that they would commit an assortment of serious crime and drain our resources by demanding welfare. We will fund our own destruction, he said.
By "US" I don't mean a specific race, I mean the people who work hard, work smart, have values and morals. Only people who want to help themselves should be helped, the others should be allowed to destroy themselves. I do not want to work hard, give the government close to half the money I earn so they can in turn give it to a bunch of losers.
I don't believe in being poor for life. My family immigrated here, we came here poor, and now thank God, and due to HARD WORK we are doing fine. If immigrants, who come here don't know the language can work and become successful... WHY THE **** CAN'T THE MAJORITY OF THE HOMEGROWN DO IT!!! If we continue to reward these losers then we will soon destroy our great country. I just witnessed selfish, arrogant, unappreciative behavior by the very people who need help the most. Now these same people who cursed me, ! refused my city's generosity, who refuse to help themselves are DEMANDING handouts on their own terms!!!!!!! They prance around as if they are owed something, and when they do receive a handout, they say it's not good enough! Well you know what? These types of people can go to hell for all I care!

Because of his ignorance, our Houstonian volunteer did not observe the condition of the people he passed by and could, therefore, not begin to bind up wounds. Though he noticed some of whom he almost approved, they could not become individuals to him. He assigned them to a group, a very small group. The rest he assigned as a group of the inferior and dangerous. In doing so, he relieved himself of any responsibility to assist either group – one group can manage on its own and the other can go to hell. Thus, he will be able to continue in his own ignorance and arrogance.

May God bless the organizations who maintain the resources, who train volunteers, who serve on the front in far-flung crises. And, may God bless this volunteer’s curiosity with wisdom enough to seek knowledge and understanding of the service they perform.